The former is Miss Queen Williams Gnassingbe Eyadema, daughter of the late Togolese president "who died of heart attack on the 5th of febuarary 2005 on a good Saturday". Erm, what was good about that?
The latter is the wife of Prince Jefri Bolkiah, former Finance Minister of Brunei and stepbrother to the "sultan of Brunei Sheik Muda Hassanal Bolkiah".
Apparently, he's accused of financial mismanagement to the tune of "US$14.8 Billion dollars". Oooh, this should be worth reading! I'd accept even 10% of that much.
She needs my help because she's kept under house arrest by the Sultan and "i have no access to a phone but I have a Palm V hand-held computer from which I am sending you this mail." Erm...
But the worst is yet to come, as they used to say on Batman.
"Before my In-castration," OUCH! they only managed to put just "Five Hundred Million United States Dollars US$500 Million in cash" into the accounts they want me to help them with.
And I just don't get out of bed for small change like that.